I hate Fridays

Every morning I wake up and I look at Fatty Catty and I wonder if "today is the day I'm going to kill her." 

I am relieved when I see she is doing OK (but she is still not well) but I know it won't be long before I have to make that decision to put her out of her misery.  Fridays are hard because I know if I don't do it today then she will have to hang in there until Monday because I can't afford an emergency vet bill for a weekend visit.

I look at her and I have to decide, "am I keeping her here for me or am I keeping her here because she is well enough and she is not suffering."  I hope I am answering honestly  when I decide every day that she is content and happy to be by my side.  It is a hard decision to make.

When I adopted her a year and a half ago I thought she was going to be dead for the first 3 months I had her.  I was just keeping her comfortable - much as I am doing now.  Back then she was just a cat that I rescued from the shelter and every day she lived was a bonus.  Then I saw an improvement and I thought to myself, "hey, she might make it afterall."

Now I have had her for awhile.  She is my friend.  We depend on each other.  She meets me at the door when I come home and if she is feeling good she is squalling at me.  If not, she jumps on her dais which is just to the right of my recliner and I pet her until she tires of it.  That is our routine.

I have another weekend with her. I am happy.  She is content.

I hate Fridays.

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Comments (2)

  1. Bettymom

    That’s the stage we’re at with Cleo Cat. I’m so sorry, because I know how hard it is.

    March 29, 2014